You will not understand my intention to listen. Although I am not the best person to do so, I want to listen beyond words- your eyes, gestures, and expressions. Every time you walk in the room, I fail to fulfill my expectations. Every time you leave, I question my success- did I listen with passion enough to let you sleep?
There is something about the emotions you pour that I do not have the audacity to insult. Turning my back as you make eye contact is the greatest rejection I can conduct in my position today. You have probably seen a lot like me, for you have seen greater years of life, to appreciate my desire to grow through you. As a million thoughts run through both of our minds, perhaps you know I cannot clear my web enough to understand your position. I cannot understand your stance and as I voice, “I am listening” you stand with hands in your pockets- “Are you really?”
At that point, I also smirk at my self-pitiful condition. A quarter of your words soaked within the walls as my mind thought of him, on the other side of the world. I disregarded the tear you discreetly brushed off as I mentally created a weekly schedule, an hourly schedule. An accidental cross of boundaries went unnoticed as I related my personal situation to yours- completely irrelevant. Your eyes squinted, reflecting some sort of uncertainty and mistrust, as I cut off your last sentence and walked out the door. Somehow, I still had the shamelessness to invite you back to my feet, in case you needed anything else.